...nothing, really.
I was talking about decisions and discipline a while ago. Well, they've been made. There is a semblance of order now...a rather tentative equilibrium. It's a start, at the very least.
Now that that is out of the way...
Ever had one of those moments when you've just known? No hard facts to sift through, nothing to work out...heck, not even enough time or the inclination to do any sorting...just the sudden, absolute, complete moment of clarity? When you know that you know?
No?
Oh come on!
I'll tell you about one of mine. It may sound silly, but it is important to me because it was my first instance of sudden, absolute clarity. My first I just know moment.
This happened in fifth grade, when we were learning to negotiate that minefield called algebra. There's something known as 'splitting the middle term'...the sort of thing you do with 2x+6xy+3y=7 (I'm not sure I have even that sample equation right...I'm not what you would call a natural at the subject). Of course, the teacher spent hours trying to show us how to do it, and of course I struggled with my first 20 or 30 questions because I just didn't see why I should split the middle term - or any term at all, for that matter - leave alone how I should do it. Mechanically, I would try one thing, and then another, till my answer matched the one in the key at the end of the book.
And then, as I sat poring over the book one evening, willing the middle term to split on its own, I suddenly knew.
I was talking about decisions and discipline a while ago. Well, they've been made. There is a semblance of order now...a rather tentative equilibrium. It's a start, at the very least.
Now that that is out of the way...
Ever had one of those moments when you've just known? No hard facts to sift through, nothing to work out...heck, not even enough time or the inclination to do any sorting...just the sudden, absolute, complete moment of clarity? When you know that you know?
No?
Oh come on!
I'll tell you about one of mine. It may sound silly, but it is important to me because it was my first instance of sudden, absolute clarity. My first I just know moment.
This happened in fifth grade, when we were learning to negotiate that minefield called algebra. There's something known as 'splitting the middle term'...the sort of thing you do with 2x+6xy+3y=7 (I'm not sure I have even that sample equation right...I'm not what you would call a natural at the subject). Of course, the teacher spent hours trying to show us how to do it, and of course I struggled with my first 20 or 30 questions because I just didn't see why I should split the middle term - or any term at all, for that matter - leave alone how I should do it. Mechanically, I would try one thing, and then another, till my answer matched the one in the key at the end of the book.
And then, as I sat poring over the book one evening, willing the middle term to split on its own, I suddenly knew.
Don’t ask me how. I have been puzzling over it for over ten years now, and I don't have an answer. The teacher made every effort to teach us the method step-by-step, but all I remember is everything falling into place like a jigsaw in one sudden moment of inspiration. So the best explanation I can come up with is, I just knew.
A psychoanalyst might be able to explain it to me scientifically...but then, I'm sure psychoanalysts have better things to do. All I know, even 14 years later, is that I never had a problem with that bit of algebra again - at least as long as I was doing it. (I will refrain from talking about the present. My skills in algebra - such as they were - are now a little, er, rusty ;) How do I summarize my knowledge of how to split the middle term? I just know. Not mathematical, hardly scientific, heavily intuitive...there it is.
Was it different from gut feeling or pure intuition or instinct, though? I am still pondering that...but all of these do have something in common: the "I just know" at the end. Intuition and instinct, I am familiar with. They're old friends. I rely a lot more on them than I do on facts and figures, anyway. Truth be told, I guess prior knowledge of facts and figures does influence your instincts to some degree. I don't think the effect is strong enough to drown the original thing out, however. If, for instance, intuition tells you to head left in spite of the road sign (literal and metaphorical) with a rightward arrow, it probably has a very good reason for doing so. Which is why I'll cheerfully turn left without a second thought if thequiet insistent little voice at the back of my head directs me that way.
In my opinion, you can't go very far wrong if you trust your instincts. The more I rely on intuition, the stronger and surer it gets...and the smaller the likelihood of a false step. I trust it on everything - situations, decisions, people, choices...you name it. And that is why, 7 out of every 10 things I say or do have no concrete explanation, no mental If-Then-Else flowcharting done in real time. Till some time ago, if I was cornered into explaining myself, I would drivel - unwillingly and unwittingly - like there was no tomorrow. Now, I simply grin and say "I just know", or "I just wanted to", or something along those lines. Sure, it doesn't do much towards clarification...
…but then, that is usually not my problem. :D
A psychoanalyst might be able to explain it to me scientifically...but then, I'm sure psychoanalysts have better things to do. All I know, even 14 years later, is that I never had a problem with that bit of algebra again - at least as long as I was doing it. (I will refrain from talking about the present. My skills in algebra - such as they were - are now a little, er, rusty ;) How do I summarize my knowledge of how to split the middle term? I just know. Not mathematical, hardly scientific, heavily intuitive...there it is.
Was it different from gut feeling or pure intuition or instinct, though? I am still pondering that...but all of these do have something in common: the "I just know" at the end. Intuition and instinct, I am familiar with. They're old friends. I rely a lot more on them than I do on facts and figures, anyway. Truth be told, I guess prior knowledge of facts and figures does influence your instincts to some degree. I don't think the effect is strong enough to drown the original thing out, however. If, for instance, intuition tells you to head left in spite of the road sign (literal and metaphorical) with a rightward arrow, it probably has a very good reason for doing so. Which is why I'll cheerfully turn left without a second thought if the
In my opinion, you can't go very far wrong if you trust your instincts. The more I rely on intuition, the stronger and surer it gets...and the smaller the likelihood of a false step. I trust it on everything - situations, decisions, people, choices...you name it. And that is why, 7 out of every 10 things I say or do have no concrete explanation, no mental If-Then-Else flowcharting done in real time. Till some time ago, if I was cornered into explaining myself, I would drivel - unwillingly and unwittingly - like there was no tomorrow. Now, I simply grin and say "I just know", or "I just wanted to", or something along those lines. Sure, it doesn't do much towards clarification...
…but then, that is usually not my problem. :D
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